Imagine your brain as a place filled with worker ants. At the moment my worker ants have taken speed. I tried to find a picture to represent it but I gave up after 5 minutes. Nothing quite felt disorganised enough. Nothing represented the chaos that is my brain at the moment. I have so much IN my head and no way to grab it and get it out. I feelt like a spectator to my own inner workings.
So last week I started ‘another’ weight loss challenge. The eating effort in the first week was dismal. I ate take aways most of the time. A week long gastro bug was my only saviour so I lost 2kg. Gastro bug has gone now, so I really have no excuse.
Everything is compounding and it feels as though nothing is going the way it is supposed to. I sit in the house because I can’t be bothered putting on a smile to face the world. I make plans because I know that staying stuck in my house doesn’t do anyone any favours but I pull out at the last minute because I work myself up about it too much.
A week ago I moved a mattress into my lounge room because I’m too lazy to both go to bed and get out of bed. We’ve been eating so much ‘crap’ that mini man looks like he has a beer belly and I have one to match. In fact it’s probably why he’s been a turd lately…..all that processed shit. Mother of the year and all that. He could spot a bottle of vodka at 20 paces but ask him to point to a body part other than his nose and he’s screwed.