During one of my many inpatient stays in 2007 one of the nurses sat me down to share with me his Life Lessons. I am so glad that he wrote them down as there was no way that I was in the right frame of mind to take it on board. Times like this I’m also glad I am a bit of a hoarder so I still have the book it is written in.
I was in a pretty bad place and I didn’t care about myself or anyone around me. I just wanted out and I wanted out now. This compassionate nurse was one of many who tried to reach me and I will be forever grateful.
All humans have a fundamental goal to be happy. I can be happy. Happiness is not a destination, you do not reach it and live there for the rest of your life. Contentment and happiness comes from constantly working on ourselves and watching how our thoughts impact our moods. Thoughts do not have the power to make us do anything, they just are.
I can recognise that the people in my life also have a goal to be happy. Therefore we must be flexible, negotiate, compromise, collaborate and cooperate.
We all deserve to have life = win/win not lose/lose or win/lose.
I must not carry baggage from my past. It is not what happened to me that counts, just my reaction that matters. I cannot control the actions of others, only my own reaction.
Keep life simple. Do not complicate life by overloading, creating conflict and trying to meet the expectations of others. It is also important to recognise that other people do not live their lives by our expectations. Standing up for your own rights is not the same as creating conflict. Sometimes there are battles that need to be started.
Be like the water not the rock.
Be flexible, tolerant and accept change.
I am enlightened (know the truth) closes your mind to all other possibilities.
Nothing is certain
Nothing is forever
No one has all the answers.
I still struggle daily with lesson 3 and 5. I have a horribly good memory for all things negative. They eat away at me every second of the day.
One rule that he didn’t write down but I still remember is to remove the word ‘should’ from your vocabulary. The word ‘should’ promotes guilt and a feeling of negative self worth.
Do you have any life lessons?
What’s one rule you have for yourself that you will never compromise on?
Linking up with Kirsty for I must confess
My life lesson so far? Don’t punish myself over my mistakes or failings, or let myself get weighed down by them. But instead learn from them and push on.
so cliche and boring of me but ‘everything happens for a reason’. Everything in my life has fallen into place even when it felt like it was falling apart. for each crappy thing that has happened something good has come from it in the end and those good things have been lifechanging.
Flexibility is one of the biggest life lessons for me, and for my entire family actually. “Be like the water and not the rock”. My teenage daughter could do with learning about flexibility too – she will in her own time, and we have to be patient and tolerant in the meantime.
Great advice here. It is hard not to carry baggage so don’t put too much pressure on yourself
Excellent life lessons.
I really need to write that book in my head, “Fuck Should” ….
I so liked reading this as it truly applies to us all doesn’t it? I’m having an internal struggle right now and it’s to do with my ‘thinking’. Sometimes I just want to slap that thinking out of my head! Tonight I used it for ‘good’ and it’s helped. Wonderful words and I am so glad you kept them. Denyse x
Yup I hate those words “shoulda coulda woulda”. I’m always telling hubster that “should” is never a good enough reason x
Lesson 3 is so important. I’m trying so hard to get my kids to take that on board, to understand that they can’t always control what happens to them but they can control how they react. We’re still working on it but, as you point out, it’s not an easy lesson to take on board, even as adults. Great advice – I bet you’re glad you kept that notebook!
THIS: “Happiness is not a destination, you do not reach it and live there for the rest of your life.” APPLAUSE. Love it. And letting go of baggage. Sigh. So important. So difficult. Great post – thanks for sharing.
My life lesson so far is that 99% of what happens today will have absolutely no impact on tomorrow.
Holy shit. That dude needs to be on the speaking circuit. That’s amazing advice.