If I ruled the world

Welcome to The Lounge!  Grab a drink and make yourself comfortable.  This week is all about world domination.  That’s right, I want to know the rules you’d make if you ruled the world.  Oh the possibilities are endless, but I managed to cut mine down to a top 10.  If I ruled the world

  • Calories at a celebration wouldn’t count.  So whether it’s your birthday, your best mates birthday or Jesus’s birthday…those calories don’t count, ever.
  • Clothes and dishes would self wash.  Clothes washing and washing the dishes are easily my least favourite housework items.  I would happily outsource those jobs for the rest of my life.
  • Periods would be non existent.  Seriously, they are the shittiest, shit thing of all of the shitty things.  How about a text message, carrier pigeon or smoke signal to let you know you aren’t up the duff and be done with it.
  • Recorders would be banned. Forever.  Mr 5 has started school this year and had his first music lesson yesterday.  There has been no mention of the dreaded ear bleed inducing instrument but I worry it’s not too far away.
  • Lice would not exist either.  Seriously what is the point of them?  Where do they fit in, in the circle of life?
  • Introduce a slap a stupid person day.  One slap, below the head, no repercussions.  Some days the only thing stopping me from going on a rampage is that I’m not keen on eating cold pasta for dinner every night for the next 20 something years.
  • Common sense test before entering a shopping centre.  Some days it feels like people decide to just leave their brain at home for the day when they go shopping.  Standing and talking at the top of the escalator, blocking entrances to shops and people walking 5 abreast…really slowly are just a few of the things that annoy me when shopping.
  • Sand would be nonstick.  The beach is so nice, squishing your toes into the sand is so nice.  Having sand in all of the places is not nice.
  • No leg hair.  Surely we are past the stage of needing extra body hair to keep warm.
  • Everyone would know what it feels like to be loved.  Love makes the world go round.  Maybe if everyone knew it, from an early age then there would be less people in emotional pain.

What would you do if you ruled the world?

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11 thoughts on “If I ruled the world

  1. Lydia C. Lee

    My youngest keeps asking me about things that lead us to talking about periods,and I really have to watch myself not to say pretty much what you said up there (I am pleased I’m not the only one – I thought I was incredible immature, but it can’t be both of us). So I try to sound all grown up and not like it’s some total pain and inconvenience….
    As for slap a stupid person day, what date would that be? I might have to go into hiding….

    Reply
  2. Alison

    >Introduce a slap a stupid person day. One slap, below the head, no repercussions. Some days the only thing stopping me from going on a rampage is that I’m not keen on eating cold pasta for dinner every night for the next 20 something years.

    So much this!

    Reply
  3. Jody at Six Little Hearts

    Had a little chuckle at ‘slap a stupid person a day’ – it has made my hands tingle!
    Nits I could do without, though I quite love having my period (the only woman in the world who does perhaps?).
    I would add that shops should be open 24 hours a day, every day, so that I could pop out whenever I wish.
    Enjoying commenting freely on WP blogs today after Akismet fixed my commenting issue. Expect more comments from here on from me!

    Reply
  4. Deborah

    I’d pick half of yours cos I can seriously relate (not kids, so not to those, though I do hate recorders….).

    In my world money would be endless. For everyone. (Wait.. maybe that’s socialism?! Do they have rulers?!)

    Deb

    Reply
  5. Grace

    Oooooh, don’t ban the recorder!!! I was in a recorder quartet (yeah, they do so exist!) when I was in high school and we came second in a Music Eisteddfod (lets ignore there were only four groups competing).
    I used to annoy the crap out of my brothers playing it around the house. Hehehe…

    Reply
  6. Lisa @ Read Write Run

    I love your list. Especially the self wash dishes, non-existent periods and common sense test. I’d extend that to driving too. I’d add clean sheet night every night (without actually having to wash said sheets and remake the bed). Life would be bliss if we ruled the world. 🙂

    Reply

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