This week Kirsty wants to know about our medical confessions. I’ve had a fairly decent amount of contact with the medical profession over the years. Some of them weird, some wonderful, some not so wonderful.
- My veins suck. When I was pregnant there was only one pathologist who could get blood first time every time. I was induced, I needed 2 cannula and it felt like every doctor in maternity had a go at trying to jab a needle in. One even went and got an ultrasound machine to no avail. Finally a nurse came to the rescue!
- You know what is really *awesome* to hear from the very spunky Doctor who is checking how dilated you are? ‘Oh wow your cervix is really far back there’…all I could think was this poor bloke was shoulder deep in my v-jay jay trying desperately to get a finger on my cervix.
- When I had one of my immunisations at 12, the nurse told me that if I didn’t look at the needle it wouldn’t hurt. I still use that technique 14 years later.
- I had an operation when I was 18. I got a staph infection. It was so gross. Holy hell it was gross.
- I have never broken a bone *touches wood* but I have weak ankles and roll them quite regularly.
- Due to the number of times I have overdosed on paracetamol I can’t take it unless it has a coating. I have integrated this into my coping mechanisms.
- When I was 15 we had to travel 16 hours for me to get an EEG done and see a neurologist. We stayed at my Aunties place, I went to get my shoes the morning after we arrived..except I forgot to pack them. We didn’t have enough time to go and buy some more before my appointment so I had to go barefoot. Thankfully the people who did the EEG gave me some surgical booties because hospital floors are freezing. I still occasionally walk out of the house to go somewhere and forget to put shoes on.
- A nurse at ED remembered me because I asked for milk to drink instead of charcoal after an OD..I have no recollection of that.
- My knees turn in, and I have a slight bow in my lower legs. It was caused by the way I sat when I was a child. I used to sit with my legs bent to either side of me, the pressure meant that my knees rolled in.
- Just over 5 years ago I went to the doctor with vague feelings of being unwell. I’d had a cold for a while and just felt sick all of the time. The doctor looked in my ear an determined is had a really bad ear infection but was over it now. He prescribed maxalon and sent me on my way. Turns out that ear infections can migrate…and turn into fetuses.
Do you have any weird and wonderful medical confessions?