One of the joyous and possibly quite scariest thing about having a toddler is they start to learn how to talk and come out with the cutest and most cringe worthy phrases.
Devil Spawn already has sarcasm down to an art. I think it’s awesome and considering I’m fluent in sarcasm, it was inevitable. He most used phrase I think is easily ‘alright’ of course said with a sigh and eye roll. This is usually after I have told him to pick up his toys for the tenth time in the space of an hour. I wouldn’t have to nag you if you did it the first time kid.
I think it’s almost a right ofpassage for a toddler to drop the ‘f’ bomb at some stage. Usually in public. Recently while out at my parents Devil Spawn dropped it, and used it in perfect context. I didn’t know whether to hug him or yell at him. What I did do was burst out laughing and attempt, in between fits of giggles to tell him it was naughty.
At the moment Devil Spawn is convinced that everyone is a man. We have many arguments about Mummy being a man and not a girl. Usually said with a sarcastic giggle from Devil Spawn. When used in the safety of The Funny Farm it’s pretty safe. When used on a bus not so much. It usually involves me hissing at him that that’s a lady not a man and me receiving a dirty look from said lady.
Mispronunciation is pretty funny too. Devil Spawn says dick instead of stick. When said in the right context it gets a bit old school girl giggle from me. His other mispronunciation though has the potentional to be a bit more mortifying. When he says ‘can’t’ it sounds an awful lot like a swear word used to describe the female anatomy. Oh yes it’s so awesome when we are at the local shopping centre and I ask him to to do something and he yells at the top of his voice ‘I c*nt’. Oh yeh that.
His favourite phrase at the moment is ‘begusting’ aka ‘disgusting’. I use the term to describe the things up his nose that he refuses to let me remove. Devil Spawn prefers to use it to describe food that he is served. I don’t mind it so much when its about noodles from the local noodle place (hey more for me) but when he uses it to describe the food I serve up, then shit has just gotten real.
What are some pearlers that your cherubs have come out with? Do you cringe every time they open their mouth in public?
What are some pearlers that your cherubs have come out with? Do you cringe every time they open their mouth in public?
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I am a “good boy”!! I love a kid swearing in public especially when its not mine!!
Kids are funny loo. My daughter was learning her spelling “duck” and “fun” and she misspelled it as “f–k”. I tried my hardest not to laugh lol
Team ‘Abulous were in a junk store yesterday when we passed a Mum and a little boy. The little boy was threatening to “fart again”. I just burst out laughing which didn’t help his poor Mum at all. I am sorry sister.
Alexander used to call vaginas “Jemimas” and once in the ladies toilets at a shopping centre, when we were (yet again) having the conversation as to why I didn’t have a penis he piped up (loudly) with “Oh! That’s right. You have a Jemima! Mama, I LOOOOVE Jemimas!!). Lots of giggles heard from the other stalls.
Sammy calls elevators ‘alligators’. ‘Tis very cute.
I can’t repeat my daughter’s clangers but I do know she got them mostly from accompanying me driving – i never usually talk like a gutter snipe but i do when i’m behind the wheel as she has reminded me 🙂
When my daughter was younger, she couldn’t say “speech impediment”. THAT got lots of laughs.
Thanks for the laughs! Miss O is 3 and whipped out a perfectly placed “it’s just so f@#king annoying” on a recent camping trip in France…. it was heard loud and clear by all around.
On these occasions I have learnt to ignore her and not laugh or tell her off because if I give it any attention I know the little monkey is going to run with it like the wind and repeat again and again!
Ha ha – love it!!! I too have some little darlings that tell me my food is disgusting!! Bless ’em.
Probably the most embarrassing moment was when my now 12 year old was about 2 and a seriously overweight man walked into the dr’s surgery – Master 2 yelled out “mum – look at that big fat man!” Yep, wanted a hole to open up in the ground and just swallow me up.
hahaha!! We get dick when trying to say disc.