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Last weekend I entered a competition through Tork’s Blog to win a 3 month membership with The Biggest Loser Club.  I told myself that if I won, this would be it, it was time to change.  This isn’t just about losing weight, this is about getting healthy, getting active and feeling better on the inside.

Over the last 18 months I went from being a gym junkie who went to the gym almost every single day to someone who lost interest in myself.  I watched the weight pile on, the clothes started to get tighter and tighter.  I was caught in a cycle of hating how I felt and having no motivation to do anything about it.

I’m not going to fill this space with excuses for how and why I got to the size I am or declarations of ‘woo let’s beat this’ because let’s face it, no one wants to read it and I don’t want to write it.  I’m overweight, I’m unhealthy and I’m unfit.  Something needs to change.  I am sick of sitting on the sidelines of life because everything hurts after standing for anything longer than 10 minutes.

I’ve put on 60kg in the last 18 months.  I am essentially carrying around another person on my joints and bones, no wonder I feel so exhausted all of the damn time.  This isn’t about looking good anymore, this is about feeling good.  Eating food that makes me feel refreshed and healthy.  Helping my body to run at its peak.  I owe it that much.

I have done my shopping.  I have my meal plan on the wall in the kitchen so that I can see it.  I have printed out an recipes that I need.  I’m setting myself up for good, for once.  I’m sending this feeling of hatred I have for myself at the moment a big fuck you.  I deserve this.  My body deserves this.  My family deserves this.