Emotional Instability

Emotional Instability is the the third symptom in the list of diagnostic criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) which I will talking about more in depth.  I have already talked about Black and White Thinking and Unstable Sense of Self.  All up there is 9 diagnostic criteria which I will be covering.emotional instability

Marsha Linehan says that people with BPD can be likened to someone with third degree burns.  They are walking around with their fragility exposed, and every slight feels excruciatingly painful.  The reactions of a person with BPD are often over the top for the situation that they are in.  This is often because they haven’t be taught or learned how to express their emotions appropriately.

Intense anger is a separate symptom to emotional instability but it is the one that I struggle with myself.  However, through therapy I have began to understand that the anger is often a mask for other emotions that I am experiencing.  Anger can often be a mask for sadness.  It can also be a reaction to feeling out of control.

Self harm is often used as a way to deal with emotional instability.  Often, the emotions are either too strong to deal with, or feeling nothing (or numb) becomes too much.  So I was harming myself to either feel something, anything at all.  I was also harming to have something physical to deal with, to replace the emotional instability.

I’ve mentioned in a previous post that it’s believed that people with a mental illness often have a lack of insight into their symptoms when they are most symptomatic.  This is also true, again for myself at least, for BPD.  I cringe looking back at some of the things that I did while the most symptomatic, especially when it was my emotional instability to blame.

At the time though I was acting out, dealing with emotions that were overwhelming.  I was lashing out at the people around me and I was hell bent on trying to get rid of those emotions.  It was excruciating and I still catch myself now falling down that hole.  I stop the communication, I can’t articulate what is wrong and my insight goes out the window.

The emotional bursts are similar to those of a small child and I feeling a burning guilt as I watch myself react.  I do have better coping skills and I can often pull myself back off the ledge.  It’s still a learning process though and I am still learning about appropriate emotion responses.  I feel strange saying that as a 27 year old woman, but it’s where I’m at.

How do you cope when you feel overwhelmed by emotions?

Do you know someone who struggles with emotional instability?

Linking up with Jess for IBOT

Sunshine Sunday: Beginnings

On Tuesday Mr 5 is off to his first day of Prep.  It’s a new beginning for him, the first step in his schooling career.  It means letting go a little and trusting him and the people that he will be around.  It’s something that I am surprisingly struggling with.

I am so excited for him.  I loved school.  He is such a curious kid and I hope that his teacher is able to work with him on his level, so that his natural curiosity isn’t lost.  I hope that the things that make him who he is, will help him start this journey.  I hope that his anxiety doesn’t hold him back.

Mr 5 has been in daycare since he was 8 weeks old for 2 days a week.  I thought that I was ready for this.  I’m not.  The feeling first hit me when we were seeing a movie before Christmas.  In front of us was a group of school kids with their teachers.  I felt my eyes well up when I realised that in a few years that could be him.  In that moment I wanted time to stand still.  I wasn’t ready for him to get older.

I will miss my little guy when he is at school.  Sure he drives me up the wall sometimes, and there are some days when I am glad for daycare day to come around again.  However, there are times when I love having another body in the house, I love sharing my day with him.  I’m worried that my little boy will be broken, that he won’t love school and there will be nothing I can do about it.

Despite my misgivings and the anxiety I have about him starting school, I am so excited to start this next chapter.  I can’t wait to see him learn, and to listen to his stories from school.  He gets so excited when he learns something new, I hope he never loses that.

Have you got kids starting school this year?  How are you feeling?

Do you remember your first day of school?

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Summer Festival

Agent Mystery Case is back on the scene for her LBD challenge.  Fashion is so far out of my realm of ‘things I am good at’ but I really enjoy doing this challenge.  The best part is that I can dream about the things I could have if money was no object.

This week the challenge is Summer Festival.  The first thing that came to mind with that prompt was music festival.  It was then that I realised that maybe my dress isn’t so versatile.  I did however manage to dress it down a little so that it was more casual.

I added a hat for those hot days which will be spent out in the sun, dancing away to the music.  I also chose a backpack with lots of pockets to carry essentials like water, wallet (with ID), phone and tickets.  Being a backpack also means that it’s easy to chuck on your back and forget about it.  I also went for flats because there is nothing worse than feeling uncertain in heels, it really puts a damper on dancing too!

 

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Evans pink shrug
18 AUD – houseoffraser.co.uk

Charlotte Russe black ballerina flat
17 AUD – charlotterusse.com

Floral canvas backpack
36 AUD – tillys.com

Gucci black oversized sunglasses
375 AUD – gucci.com

Forever New hat
forevernew.com.au

School Daze

Welcome to The Lounge! Grab a drink, take a seat and make yourself comfortable.  This week in The Lounge it’s all about School.  Some people dread it, some people love it.  Either way, education is a pretty central part of being a kid and being a parent.

Next Tuesday Mr 5 is off to start Prep.  We have the giant pile of stationary needed, all the books and the copy paper.  Yep that’s right, copy paper.  The government is funding public schools so poorly now that parents have to provide paper for the school.  Don’t get me wrong, I don’t begrudge the school for asking for it, but I do side-eye the government for letting it happen.school loungeOn social media over the last week or so there have been a few posts talking about the needs for starting school.  There are different pieces of technology, requested brands and sometimes a list as long as your arm of stationary that needs to be bought.  There’s also a lot of misinformation about those needs and a lot of complaining.

Now, I completely understand the outcry when technology is a necessity in the classroom now, and the parents pay for the pleasure.  I do think that it would be better if the school is able to purchase these in bulk (and hopefully getting a discount) so they could be sold to parents for a cheaper price.

However, what I don’t understand is when people just flat out refuse to buy the things for their child, or buy things that aren’t what was requested.  I’m talking more of the model of technology needed, rather than buying store brand pencils here.  School is hard enough for some kids, I don’t understand why anyone would choose to make it harder by not giving their kids the tools that they need.

I have friends who are teachers and it annoys me that people complain about the tools the teacher is using to teach their child.  If only they had any idea the kind of money that is put in by the teacher themselves.  They buy extra resources, because they know that there will always be a student who doesn’t have the things they need.  That makes me really sad.

I’m glad though that we have teachers who are willing to fill the massive gaps left by the government funding.  A good education is so important and the reality is that not all kids have the same opportunities.  Public education isn’t free anymore and it hasn’t been for a long time.

Have you got everything ready for school yet?

What was your favourite subject at school?

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